PO Blog: What my voice says about what I think about you

I am a high self-monitor. Self-monitoring refers to peoples’ regulation of their own behavior in different social situations (Snyder, 1987), and high self-monitors, the type who are concerned with public image, saying the right thing, and being on everyone’s good side, score highly on the Self-Monitoring Scale, which has a range of 0-18 (Snyder, 1974; Snyder & Gangestad, 1986). I scored a 14.

One aspect of myself that I adjust for different social situations is the pitch of my voice. When I talk to authority figures (teachers, parents, etc.) or strangers, my voice is the lowest; when I talk to friends or classmates, my voice is mid-range or lower; and when I talk to my boyfriend, my voice is mid-range or higher. I noticed my own inconsistencies after I observed my commander varying his voice for interactions with his peers, those who had higher status, and those who had lower status. When I realized that I do the same thing, I questioned why he changes his voice, and what impact it has on others. In line with Bem’s self-perception theory, which states that we observe ourselves as an outsider like we observe others, if I answered these questions, I would learn more about myself (Bem, 1972).

I concluded that the real pitch of his voice is the one used when talking with his peers because in those instances he did not tuck in his chin and look slightly uncomfortable. However, when ever he talked to officers (higher status) or me (lower status), he did tuck in his chin to lower his voice. For the first question, I believe that he lowered his voice to appear more authoritative and competent because he only talked about business with people not in his status group, and when he talked business with his peers, he would also lower his voice. I do the same changes in my voice for authority and peers, but for my boyfriend, I also raise my voice sometimes to seem more innocent, dependent, and submissive. For the second question, I concluded that I would not think him any less authoritative or competent if his voice was higher, but I had also known him half a year by this point. The conclusion made me wonder if I stopped changing my voice for different social situations, would people think differently of me?

I decided to make the change on a Friday because I have one class which exposes me to teachers and classmates, and I also spend more time with my roommate and boyfriend, who are more likely to comment on a change. I changed my voice by deliberately raising my chin (not tucking it in) whenever I spoke to authority figures or was explaining something to a classmate or friend. I also deliberately tucked in my chin whenever I spoke to my boyfriend. The change was not hard to do because I could physically control it, but it was hard to hear myself talk differently in those situations.

Whenever I raised my voice, I got the questions “What put you in such a good mood?” or “Are you having a good day?” frequently from my classmates and my roommate. When I lowered my voice, my boyfriend almost hourly asked me what was wrong, and why I was so serious (Dark Knight reference purely coincidental).

I was nervous about how others would perceive me before I did the experiment, but when my friends thought I was happier, the change became easier and less awkward to hear myself talk. The change became a little straining when I talked with my boyfriend because he thought I was sad and it physically strained my voice to talk that much while lowering my voice. If others had thought anything other than my emotions, such as my competence, had changed, it would’ve been much more difficult.

I learned that the pitch of my voice is not as important in portraying my competence as in portraying my emotions while talking with people who already knew me. However, when I first meet people, I would never want to talk in a higher voice to an authority, because I do not want to convey a more submissive personality, or a lower voice to those closest to me, because I do not want to be that serious. I discovered that even though self-presentation strategies, ways we try to shape what others think of us and how we think of ourselves (Schlenker, 2003) such as self-monitoring, might not be meditated, they happen because we like to control how others perceive us.


Bem, D. J. (1972). Self-perception theory. In L. Berkowitz (Ed.), Advances in experimental social psychology (Vol. 6, pp. 1-62). New York: Academic Press.

Schlenker, B. R. (2003). Self-presentation. In M. R. Leary & J. P. Tangney (Eds.), Handbook of self and identity (pp.429-518). New York: Guilford.

Snyder, M. (1974). The self-monitoring of expressive behavior. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 30, 526-537.

Snyder, M. (1987). Public appearances private/realities: the psychology of self-monitoring. New York: Freeman.

Snyder, M., & Gangestad, S. (1986) On the nature of self-monitoring: Matters of assessment, matters of validity. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 51, 125-139.